So Heather’s journal entry about wanting something more from her 32nd birthday than just presents and family love got me thinking. (It made me remember giving a giant chocolate chip cookie to my college roomate. Maybe I should send H a giant cookie?)

I tend to think I am the only person in the world (or at least in my life) who gets depressed for no reason. I guess I ain’t the only one.

I say this because I had a bad SAHM (stay at home mom) day yesterday that ended up with all 3 of us crying for various reasons.

It made me sit down and wonder what I had to show for myself and my degrees? (especially since I just managed to pay them off) Here I was emotionally abusing my daughter and worrying about the leftover rice from dinner.

I have accomplished things (but not to the extent I wish in terms of writing) and I have been places, but none of these things really have tangible results. They are more what makes me the kind of person I am.

Heather’s entry really struck a chord with me. Not that I think I’ve been as saintly as she has (just the opposite) but in that I wonder what I will have to show for my life (other than children in need of a psychotherapist) in another 10 years…

Advertisements