Naoto is writing advice to his ex-colleague at cognos in Tokyo about his pregnant wife (for the first time.)
The friend (american married to a Japanese woman) asked if all the stuff his wife has suddenly decided to buy is really necessary.
Naoto told me that he wrote to his friend that he should let his wife buy anything she needs in order to feel psychologically prepared, even if it never gets used.
He then said to me, “after two children I have finally realized that men become ‘father’ only when they first see and hold a baby, but a woman becomes a ‘mother’ during her pregnancy.”
On one hand I’m like “that’s my sensitive japanese guy” and on the other hand I’m like “it’s about time you realized that!”
I’ve been thinking about impending parenthood a lot recently what with h&j adopting and two other dear high school friends both due Septemberish with their first child.
I was all waxing philosophical as I lay next to Maika with her head pillowed on my arm, my nose buried in her whispy hair. I was thinking that a child being born is like a boulder in a stream. Your life is a stream rushing downhill, and if a boulder suddenly gets dropped in the middle of your life, it isn’t that your life stops, but it never follows the same path again.
You can never get over the fact that there’s a big ole boulder right in the middle of it.
And as a stay at home mom (or woman in general except in rare cases) having the main responsibility for the emotional and physical welfare of that boulder is darn scary sometimes.